Week 15: Grandparents

'Are grandparents being forced to practically raise their grandchildren?'

I am a proud parent of four beautiful children.  I created them, and it is my (and my partner's) responsibility to raise them.  But I look around at the other parents nowadays, and so many of them are dumping their children with the grandparents to look after them, so they can go out partying!  As I said, they are MY children, and if I wanted partying to be a priority in my life, I would not have had children!  My parents had their turn raising children (me!) and now it is my turn to enjoy the ride.  Children are a MASSIVE responsibility, but aren't they worth it? 

So many people say to me, 'why don't I watch the kids for you, so you and (partner) can have a nice night out?'  It is a lovely gesture, but to be honest, I do not want time away from my children!  They are my most precious possesions, and I am proud that they are mine.  I love being around them and when they are away from me, let's just say I am not in a good mood.  People also say to me 'You need quality grown up time'.  I do agree, and that is why my children are in bed by 7:00pm!  I have all evening to spend with my partner, watching scary movies and eating naughty treats!  I do not need to dump them with somebody else to enjoy myself!

Furthermore, children are very impressionable.  The more time that they spend with other people, the less influence you have over them.  If you want them to think and behave in a certain way, you are the best person to raise them.  This is also very important when it comes to morals and beliefs.  Grandparents are wonderful, do not get me wrong.  The world would be a very quiet and boring place without them!  But I know my children better than anyone else, as I should.  And I know that when my eldest boy is crying for a chocolate bar, the last thing I should do is give him one.  I am trying to teach him some self control and how to deal with things without crying.  But grandparents, are not trying to teach them, after all, that is not their job.  It is a parents job to teach their children all of the important things in life, not the grandparents.  As I said before, they have had their turn, and now it is their time to relax and enjoy the good side of things, without having to deal with the tantrums or poopy bottoms.

Also, grandparents are not as physically capable as parents are, and it is unfair on the grandparents to expect them to be.  These selfish 'parents' nowadays who dump their children with granma and granpa to go off partying are putting a lot of pressure onto the elderly.  How are they supposed to run after kids, smack them when they are naughty, pick them up when they fall over, and deal with the generally exhausting day?

People need to step up to the plate of responsibility.  If you do not want children, or are not willing to be there for them 100% of the time, DO NOT HAVE SEX!  Children are hard, exausting work who need to be the primary focus of your life.  They are selfish parasites who will never think of you and your needs, your financial situation or your feelings.  But if you are willing to take all of these things on board, it is the most rewarding experience, not one to be palmed off to your parents.  Unfortunately, the sad truth is, people do not care about their children!  They have pain-free scheduled births, get their husband or friends (or parents) to bottle feed them with formula, and then dump them in childcare as soon as they can!  People are not raising their children anymore, and THEY are the ones missing out!  They are missing the MOST rewarding parts of life!  The smiles they give you when they are drunk on mummy's milk (this does not mean a drunken Mummy's milk!), the great big grin they get when you give them a special treat, and the way they give you a hug and whisper in your ear 'I love you Mummy/Daddy'.  If they fall and hurt their knee, a hug and a kiss seem to posses magic qualities! 

Life is not about money, power or friends.  It is about these tiny, everday moments that could be so easily overlooked and missed.  People are never seeing these magic moments, and their lives are poorer for it.  People please, be a parent!  Spend QUALITY time with your children and loved ones.  It passes in the blink of an eye, and once it is gone, it is gone!

So please, leave an opinion.  Good or bad I do not mind.  Just make sure you share!

-T.J.