"Is smoking killing the next generation?"
Now, anyone who knows me, knows that I hate smoking. It is pointless, smelly, expensive, dirty, and an overall pain in my life. However, never having tried it, I cannot criticise TOO much (though I probably still will). But in reality, I do not care what people do in the privacy of THEIR house. They can smoke themselves to death and that does not involve me, nor should it. My problem however is children.
I think that the worst thing I have ever seen is when I was working in (a fast food restaurant), and I was outside cleaning some tables. A woman was sitting at a table, cradling a new born (not even a week old), smoking a cigarette. She was pratically blowing smoke into the poor things face. The little baby began coughing, and the woman said to the person next to her 'what's wrong with it? Is it sick or something?' It took every ounce of my being to not smack her in the face. As I said, I do not care what an adult does in their own house, but when you bring children into the equation, I CARE! They cannot get away, they cannot stop you, and they cannot tell you that you are hurting them. You are taking away their choice and their health, just for some selfish, and might I add temporary, self gratification!
Unfortunately, I have an even worse example. When I was working in a different location, one of my co-workers was braging that when she was pregnant, she used to smoke all of the time, and none of her children had any problems! I could not believe my ears! That was possibly the most disgusting thing I had EVER heard! That poor little baby was doomed before it ever got started. I also later found out that both of her children had severe asthma problems, but she could not see the correlation. I am sorry, but people disgust me! As soon as you become a parent, (or even a parent-to-be) you have responsibility over another person's life. Wouldn't you want to give them the best chance at life? Your own wants and desires come second to the needs of your child!
I do have an example of a glimmer of hope though. I had a relief chef come into work one day, and while she was there she seemed quite pre-occupied, so I took her aside while it was quiet, and I asked her if everything was okay. She told me that that morning she had found out she was pregnant. On top of this, she was a smoker. "I just threw all of my cigarettes into the bin. Quitting isn't very difficult when you have no choice." I was so pleased to hear that at least one person out there had a brain in their head!
Now, as I said, I am not a smoker, nor have I EVER tried one, so this is not my field of expertiece. But I do know that I see far too many people smoking around their children or loved ones who have chosen not to, but are still being affected. The sad truth is that there are thousands of parents out there who would rather satisfy their wants, than to satisfy their children's needs, and I for one am digusted at their selfishness. If something drastic is not done to stop our youth being exposed to this nastiness, they are going to be dying before they start growing.
If you have any opinions on this topic, please leave a comment.
-T.J.
Friday, 25 May 2012
Thursday, 17 May 2012
Week 15: Grandparents
'Are grandparents being forced to practically raise their grandchildren?'
I am a proud parent of four beautiful children. I created them, and it is my (and my partner's) responsibility to raise them. But I look around at the other parents nowadays, and so many of them are dumping their children with the grandparents to look after them, so they can go out partying! As I said, they are MY children, and if I wanted partying to be a priority in my life, I would not have had children! My parents had their turn raising children (me!) and now it is my turn to enjoy the ride. Children are a MASSIVE responsibility, but aren't they worth it?
So many people say to me, 'why don't I watch the kids for you, so you and (partner) can have a nice night out?' It is a lovely gesture, but to be honest, I do not want time away from my children! They are my most precious possesions, and I am proud that they are mine. I love being around them and when they are away from me, let's just say I am not in a good mood. People also say to me 'You need quality grown up time'. I do agree, and that is why my children are in bed by 7:00pm! I have all evening to spend with my partner, watching scary movies and eating naughty treats! I do not need to dump them with somebody else to enjoy myself!
Furthermore, children are very impressionable. The more time that they spend with other people, the less influence you have over them. If you want them to think and behave in a certain way, you are the best person to raise them. This is also very important when it comes to morals and beliefs. Grandparents are wonderful, do not get me wrong. The world would be a very quiet and boring place without them! But I know my children better than anyone else, as I should. And I know that when my eldest boy is crying for a chocolate bar, the last thing I should do is give him one. I am trying to teach him some self control and how to deal with things without crying. But grandparents, are not trying to teach them, after all, that is not their job. It is a parents job to teach their children all of the important things in life, not the grandparents. As I said before, they have had their turn, and now it is their time to relax and enjoy the good side of things, without having to deal with the tantrums or poopy bottoms.
Also, grandparents are not as physically capable as parents are, and it is unfair on the grandparents to expect them to be. These selfish 'parents' nowadays who dump their children with granma and granpa to go off partying are putting a lot of pressure onto the elderly. How are they supposed to run after kids, smack them when they are naughty, pick them up when they fall over, and deal with the generally exhausting day?
People need to step up to the plate of responsibility. If you do not want children, or are not willing to be there for them 100% of the time, DO NOT HAVE SEX! Children are hard, exausting work who need to be the primary focus of your life. They are selfish parasites who will never think of you and your needs, your financial situation or your feelings. But if you are willing to take all of these things on board, it is the most rewarding experience, not one to be palmed off to your parents. Unfortunately, the sad truth is, people do not care about their children! They have pain-free scheduled births, get their husband or friends (or parents) to bottle feed them with formula, and then dump them in childcare as soon as they can! People are not raising their children anymore, and THEY are the ones missing out! They are missing the MOST rewarding parts of life! The smiles they give you when they are drunk on mummy's milk (this does not mean a drunken Mummy's milk!), the great big grin they get when you give them a special treat, and the way they give you a hug and whisper in your ear 'I love you Mummy/Daddy'. If they fall and hurt their knee, a hug and a kiss seem to posses magic qualities!
Life is not about money, power or friends. It is about these tiny, everday moments that could be so easily overlooked and missed. People are never seeing these magic moments, and their lives are poorer for it. People please, be a parent! Spend QUALITY time with your children and loved ones. It passes in the blink of an eye, and once it is gone, it is gone!
So please, leave an opinion. Good or bad I do not mind. Just make sure you share!
-T.J.
I am a proud parent of four beautiful children. I created them, and it is my (and my partner's) responsibility to raise them. But I look around at the other parents nowadays, and so many of them are dumping their children with the grandparents to look after them, so they can go out partying! As I said, they are MY children, and if I wanted partying to be a priority in my life, I would not have had children! My parents had their turn raising children (me!) and now it is my turn to enjoy the ride. Children are a MASSIVE responsibility, but aren't they worth it?
So many people say to me, 'why don't I watch the kids for you, so you and (partner) can have a nice night out?' It is a lovely gesture, but to be honest, I do not want time away from my children! They are my most precious possesions, and I am proud that they are mine. I love being around them and when they are away from me, let's just say I am not in a good mood. People also say to me 'You need quality grown up time'. I do agree, and that is why my children are in bed by 7:00pm! I have all evening to spend with my partner, watching scary movies and eating naughty treats! I do not need to dump them with somebody else to enjoy myself!
Furthermore, children are very impressionable. The more time that they spend with other people, the less influence you have over them. If you want them to think and behave in a certain way, you are the best person to raise them. This is also very important when it comes to morals and beliefs. Grandparents are wonderful, do not get me wrong. The world would be a very quiet and boring place without them! But I know my children better than anyone else, as I should. And I know that when my eldest boy is crying for a chocolate bar, the last thing I should do is give him one. I am trying to teach him some self control and how to deal with things without crying. But grandparents, are not trying to teach them, after all, that is not their job. It is a parents job to teach their children all of the important things in life, not the grandparents. As I said before, they have had their turn, and now it is their time to relax and enjoy the good side of things, without having to deal with the tantrums or poopy bottoms.
Also, grandparents are not as physically capable as parents are, and it is unfair on the grandparents to expect them to be. These selfish 'parents' nowadays who dump their children with granma and granpa to go off partying are putting a lot of pressure onto the elderly. How are they supposed to run after kids, smack them when they are naughty, pick them up when they fall over, and deal with the generally exhausting day?
People need to step up to the plate of responsibility. If you do not want children, or are not willing to be there for them 100% of the time, DO NOT HAVE SEX! Children are hard, exausting work who need to be the primary focus of your life. They are selfish parasites who will never think of you and your needs, your financial situation or your feelings. But if you are willing to take all of these things on board, it is the most rewarding experience, not one to be palmed off to your parents. Unfortunately, the sad truth is, people do not care about their children! They have pain-free scheduled births, get their husband or friends (or parents) to bottle feed them with formula, and then dump them in childcare as soon as they can! People are not raising their children anymore, and THEY are the ones missing out! They are missing the MOST rewarding parts of life! The smiles they give you when they are drunk on mummy's milk (this does not mean a drunken Mummy's milk!), the great big grin they get when you give them a special treat, and the way they give you a hug and whisper in your ear 'I love you Mummy/Daddy'. If they fall and hurt their knee, a hug and a kiss seem to posses magic qualities!
Life is not about money, power or friends. It is about these tiny, everday moments that could be so easily overlooked and missed. People are never seeing these magic moments, and their lives are poorer for it. People please, be a parent! Spend QUALITY time with your children and loved ones. It passes in the blink of an eye, and once it is gone, it is gone!
So please, leave an opinion. Good or bad I do not mind. Just make sure you share!
-T.J.
Thursday, 10 May 2012
Week 14: Breastfeeding
"Should babies begin on solid foods before six months?"
This question comes from the news the other night. Apparently some 'expert' has come out saying that the sooner the better. He was saying that four months or earlier if they seem interested is ideal for helping them to not have an allergic reaction to foods. What a ridiculous thing to say.
Now I am no expert on the matter, scientifically anyway, but I have had four children, all with no known food allergies. What we do is give them strictly breastmilk (I am not getting into the formula debate, as I will insult too many idiots) until six months. Before that time, no other food is to even touch their lips. Once they turn six months, we gradually start introducing low risk, pureed foods. Usually we start by just giving them breastmilk on a spoon to teach the concept. Then we move onto cooked, pureed rice mixed with breastmilk to make it watery. We don't give meat until they are nine months and are getting the hang of vegetables. At one year (on their birthday) we give them a peanut butter sandwich, and after that we don't hold back, trying to expose them to as many different foods and flavours as we can, including spicy foods and different cultures foods.
This has worked 100% of the time for us, so with results like that who can argue. Unfortunately there are other factors involved that can lead to food allergies. I do believe some of these include:
- Premature babies
- Babies whose mothers smoked (it does not even have to be while they were pregnant. Research has shown that the eggs can be damaged well before they are released.)
- Fathers who smoked (Again research has shown that a man who smoked when his sperm first became active (about eleven) had a much, much higher chance of having children with weight problems and other related issues)
- Formula fed babies I believe are at a higher likelihood of developing allergies also, as they are not getting the food through the breastmilk (again, can you sense my opinion on the breastfeeding/formula argument?)
- Perhaps even genetics
I would like to add that we do not fully understand all of the reasons for allergies, so please do not think I am directly blaming anyone for their childrens health problems, or saying you are a bad parent. I am just trying to give light to an over-shadowed view.
Now, if anyone out there happens to be a nurse, midwife or other expert in relevant fields, I would appreciate any information they could provide on this topic.
My partner and I had always wanted children, so we made sure that we got married young, and had children young, giving them the best chances for the best health. However, I do understand that not everybody has this luxury. So, for that reason I think it is fool-hardy to expose your baby to foods before their system is ready to cope with it. The sad truth is though, that society finds it easier to blame other factors for allergy problems, than to encourage women to do the right thing for their babies and BREASTFEED them for as long as possible!
If you have a little one with allergies, or have any information on this important topic, or even if you just want to throw in your two cents, let us know.
-T.J.
This question comes from the news the other night. Apparently some 'expert' has come out saying that the sooner the better. He was saying that four months or earlier if they seem interested is ideal for helping them to not have an allergic reaction to foods. What a ridiculous thing to say.
Now I am no expert on the matter, scientifically anyway, but I have had four children, all with no known food allergies. What we do is give them strictly breastmilk (I am not getting into the formula debate, as I will insult too many idiots) until six months. Before that time, no other food is to even touch their lips. Once they turn six months, we gradually start introducing low risk, pureed foods. Usually we start by just giving them breastmilk on a spoon to teach the concept. Then we move onto cooked, pureed rice mixed with breastmilk to make it watery. We don't give meat until they are nine months and are getting the hang of vegetables. At one year (on their birthday) we give them a peanut butter sandwich, and after that we don't hold back, trying to expose them to as many different foods and flavours as we can, including spicy foods and different cultures foods.
This has worked 100% of the time for us, so with results like that who can argue. Unfortunately there are other factors involved that can lead to food allergies. I do believe some of these include:
- Premature babies
- Babies whose mothers smoked (it does not even have to be while they were pregnant. Research has shown that the eggs can be damaged well before they are released.)
- Fathers who smoked (Again research has shown that a man who smoked when his sperm first became active (about eleven) had a much, much higher chance of having children with weight problems and other related issues)
- Formula fed babies I believe are at a higher likelihood of developing allergies also, as they are not getting the food through the breastmilk (again, can you sense my opinion on the breastfeeding/formula argument?)
- Perhaps even genetics
I would like to add that we do not fully understand all of the reasons for allergies, so please do not think I am directly blaming anyone for their childrens health problems, or saying you are a bad parent. I am just trying to give light to an over-shadowed view.
Now, if anyone out there happens to be a nurse, midwife or other expert in relevant fields, I would appreciate any information they could provide on this topic.
My partner and I had always wanted children, so we made sure that we got married young, and had children young, giving them the best chances for the best health. However, I do understand that not everybody has this luxury. So, for that reason I think it is fool-hardy to expose your baby to foods before their system is ready to cope with it. The sad truth is though, that society finds it easier to blame other factors for allergy problems, than to encourage women to do the right thing for their babies and BREASTFEED them for as long as possible!
If you have a little one with allergies, or have any information on this important topic, or even if you just want to throw in your two cents, let us know.
-T.J.
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